To be or not to be here...

Suddenly there is a change in the weather, not only literally, but also figuratively. Everyone wants me to be back in Bangalore, both official and personally. I have been thinking about it for a few weeks now because its nearing a year in a couple of months and I need to decide what I am going to do after that. A slight hesitation on my part and every one pounced on me and as usual even before I can think of anything that would make my stay here a little longer, I am starting the process to move back.... Gosh!!! Talk of plans...

I have been going back and forth to Bangalore and Coimbatore every month with almost one or the other reasons. And my time here in Hyderabad has been pleasant and effective (more so officially than personally ;) ...please don't tell my manager). I have got new friends and I have been a little more open to new people and I am a year older now...that would mean more maturity to handle things and feelings. My alone time, with nothing to do, has allowed me to think a lot. I have been in Hyderabad during its best season ;), remember I escaped to Europe during its hottest months. Now its raining and colder (not like the biting cold of Bangalore..but a chilling cold).

I would definitely miss my close friend here. She has been a big support to me when I had no one and without her this place might not have been the same for me. Thank you dear, you know who you are :). I definitely owe a great deal to you. And remember to ping me when you come to Bangalore or Coimbatore. And once you are ready to go for trips let me know, we can plan something. You know that I have experience in handling kids now :).

When I needed a much needed break, people around me helped me get it with the least resistance and there were people around to help me with it too. I got to be alone and yet not lonely, which is primarily what I wanted in the first place along with some new faces and friends thrown in the equation. I finally got to see the Golconda Fort which I had missed during my initial stay 12 years ago. I would miss taking my niece to the zoo here which is much bigger than the one in Coimbatore or Bangalore.  But anyways, I can take her whenever she is ready to travel with me alone. I am really thankful to all those people who helped me during my break and for my break.

Where I thought, it might another month or so to move out, now it seems like its gonna be a couple of weeks. Why is suddenly every one eager to move me back to Bangalore...??? I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason and I wish that there is something good about to happen again ;)

I would always cherish my stay here in Hyderabad no matter given the limited amount of time. It was a cushion which made my emotional fall a little better and gave me time to come back with a bang. I have not cried even a single time for the older reasons which I used to have when I was in Bangalore. Going back now I know that I wont be the same person who left that place and that a new and slightly confident person is going to be back in my home. Sometimes its just a journey away from the normal flow of life that is needed to see a few things in perspective. That is the reason I love to travel once in a while, because that always give me a sense of discovery both emotionally and physically. I am sure that going back to Bangalore is just another leg of my journey and I feel that my destination is somewhere else. I might be wrong too..but that is just what I feel now. 

Welcome Back and Send Off

I never thought of it when I booked my ticket to Bangalore. But ironically, when I am here to send off one of my friend to her dream country on her new job, I am also here to welcome my other friend on his not-so-new job and a life of stability. I am so happy for both of them, that I am waiting for their treats. Well, I already completed one, and waiting for the other ;). Don't be surprised to find that I came all the way to Bangalore to be treated...Well , a woman got to do what she go to do, ain't? Jokes apart, its my way of showing them that I care for them. I care less for the treat, I don't eat much anyways. I am not good in communicating my thoughts through voice, but writing them, I can do that. So here it is for one my two friends.

To the one going to the 'far far away' place and your dream place:
 All the very best for the new chapter of your life. You have worked hard for it and in the process lost a lot too. I can already see the happiness in your face. And life out there isn't going to be any easier than it it is here. But I know for sure that you will find the way to overcome the hurdles, as you always do. Just don't panic, as you always do. Whenever things get hard or tough, just remember you have fought tougher battles. Things can only get better from here on. I am supposed to be the sense of reason for you here and not tell you that life is going to all glory and cozy out there. Nope...that is a dream. Life is tough anywhere only if we chose to see it that way. Forget the past, but not its lessons and know that you are much more stronger and smarter than you think. I won't be following you in Facebook, but I hope you keep in touch and tell me all about your adventures, of which I am sure. Its perfectly normal to feel unsure of things that you are going to do when you go there. But you know how to get aid ;) so you have nothing to worry there. I think you might miss your temple visits here. And you know that you wont get free food in the temple's everyday there isn't? I bet you will miss that too. You won't be missing your friends, because you already have enough of them there and there will be someone who will be ready to listen to you (and whine ;)...). And please do not burn agarbathi's and lamps (and in turn burn the sheets) .... we don't want to see you in the TV addressing the media that it was just a mistake and was not meant to do any harm to anyone :D. I hope you know when I am kidding and when I am serious here.

You asked me if I would miss you and I didn't answer it. Because I don't believe in it. I know you wanted to hear that because  you wanted to mean something to someone and it would have given you happiness if I had said that I would. But I didn't want to give you a false hope. We have enough history between us and enough parallel's in life, that it will be difficult to not miss you, if you want to put it that way. You were there when my life took a nasty turn and I wouldn't forget the days when I had to take asylum in your home and you were so ready to take care of me and never expected anything in return. You also know that if you need anything, I am just a phone call away and I would do what ever it is in my power to get it done for you.

When you are settled down and ready for a normal life, please start driving there and 'do not' harm any pedestrians or motorcyclists and drive faster to address the minimum speed there or else you will get arrested :D. You know that we might not get you a gift, for the only history that anyone getting a gift (or a rather a send off gift) has the habit of coming back and we 'don't' want you coming back, not for our sake, but for yours actually. You still have that handbag I hope ;).

All said and done, have a blast in life for god's sake, enjoy life in a new way but stay grounded and try doing something new. The only person who can make you happy is YOU. I am addressing these here, because I know you would read it and you might want to hear my voice (or rather my words in your voice) when you need a word of strength. All the very best and we are very happy for the new journey in your life and pray that it would give you peace and contentment in life and we are glad that we are still part of it.

.

Are Women crazy or just fun?

After reading the post, 'Women are Crazy', I couldn't help but write this. As a woman I should be Appalled (see capital A), furious about what was written. But all I could was 

Why ? Because
a) It was written by a man, and that is just his side of the story. He is definitely entitled to have an opinion isn't.
b) It was not based on any research study or anything. There was no experiments conducted on a set of women to really establish those facts. Most of them are from personal experiences and hear say stories
c) Most of it is 'true'. No doubt about that. What points exactly.... well that depends on the individual.
and finally
d) it was 'FUN' to read.

I have had quite a few fights with my friends when they have these kind of comments on women. For e.g. the one discussion we have had every now and then is 'women are the worst drivers'. And I keep arguing it. Every.Single.Time. Based on a small set of women they have seen, they form a correlation between women and driving. Well, since there is no theory established on that based on the various experimental studies (yea yea I have been reading about these stuff recently..) its just their opinion. But again, I would still argue with them the next time they state this. Because mostly its fun to argue and secondly, if I don't they will always assume that what they said is correct, which is not the case here.

There was this one incident, where one guy who had visited our U.S office from another country had to extend his stay for another month. He (not an Indian) was telling me how his girlfriend made a big drama when he told her about his extension and finally she agreed to it after so much reluctance and when he promised to get her something from U.S. And said to me.. 'oh women and their drama...!!!'. He had no idea that he told it to the last person whom he shouldn't have done that. I asked him if his girl friend had agreed to his extension without saying anything or protesting, would he have felt good about it? He wasn't sure (well because something like that never happens right?). So then I asked him if he would think that since she was OK with his extension, will he feel, even may be for a few seconds, that she might be OK with their separation and that she is not bothered about him or doesn't love him enough to want to be near him. Now, he started thinking.. and said that may be he would have felt a little bad about it..(and then drown a beer and things are alright for him.. Men!!!) Then I told him that the way women behave that way is to make you feel that you are wanted and that you are loved (in turn boost their ego exponentially, even though they crib about it a lot). They may be perfectly fine with the separation and they might have their own work to do, but that little drama added some spice to his life and in turn is a way to remind him that he is cherished and missed in her life. If she was angry that he should be back at any cost and blah blah blah ,...then yes, he should look for someone else. But all she did was whine a little and give in to him. Without that drama, life would be boring.. no? Now, he got a little confused and was wondering if there is more to a simple whining ;). I know I was playing some mind games there but well as long as I get my point across !!! (hey, I am a woman after all)

No doubt, women have so many layers of mystery. You don't know why they whine for things that seem very silly or simple. Why they ask you questions that might be very irrelevant to you for a situation. Why they try to find different meanings for a single simple sentence that you deliver. Why there seems to be no simple answers to anything you ask. Why they use tears as a weapon, when all else fails. Too many why's. But guess what, without those, if they give it you straight, then  may be men will treat them like one of them. They lose the mystery element that is part of being a woman. The balance is lost. It might work well with friends. But in relationships, it would get boring after some time wouldn't it? Being too predictable is not good. This doesn't mean men don't have their faults. Ask any woman, she would say that all men prefer sports to wives/girl friends, after marriages they prefer to go on tours with their friends rather than family (which is totally a 180 of what they would want before marriage), they work late hours and say that they are doing it for the family (well family needs you in person too you know) etc etc etc..

Well, all in all, I like that we women are so varied in nature, that its not easy to categorize us in groups. We at times tend to keep men at their toes just for the heck of it, or even unknowingly, because it is in our nature. We are emotional, but that is where we derive our strength. If you could guess us so easily then we would be doomed. We are the way we are to help nature maintain the balance ;)

We are crazy but crazy is fun too... isnt?